Geneva was around 15th. I've been telling about it to people .. first to Berkeley, then to friends all over and funnily we were in the Swiss press. I guess elsewhere too but I don't know of that.

Now is home, almost. Because I'm not there yet and because it has changed. This was my first day in Finland. It was really surprising. Good and confusing. Nothing like I expected, somewhat frustrating but most of all .. normal. Heavy in it, even. I wonder how it starts. In a way everything is so much better than before but still so wonderfully vague. Like me.

A friend here was having a terrible hangover that changed my life too. He talked about what's behind, which is the future I commented, the things you-we can't see. I echoed the phone call back to him in sweet indian finnish.

Today I was sitting here, netting, seeing flower fields and bjork-forests and .. like I told to Berkeley, a genuine Finnish scene. In the evening some of the Helsinki-streets were there already. Now it's night and raining. I guess I'm starting to be here and realize that not only for some days - not so that I'd have to see everything and everyone .. all my friends .. in a day or so but I have the rest of my life to do everything in peace. Thank you, the world, for that.

(talking about world: something is happening to the irc. or is it, like a friend describes:"Electronic wilderness, Nightmare of the unintiated ones, Safe haven for the lost children of this technological apocalypse". He's an-other wonderfully lost child and we come from the same.)

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and the third. plus bloated fourth. Fifth was a good one! Sixth a quick bio-peek.. Seventh started from the RAI-Sun. Then the eighth was scared of the mouse that returned, wrote long e-mails to Finland pulling life together, survived the utterly orange Queen's Day to return here to dream about home and grandmother's baking with friends back home. Ninth saw some pictures and got ill, disappearance from the net and fever and stuff happened. Brother came, sun was shining, tenth happened and was away for long. Eleventh is even less intense .. you know what it means?

The intensivity has been elsewhere, of course. It does not really reflect here. Even less for my friends on the net. My life is only here - not here, if you know what I mean. The twelfth was a bounce to the net from the worlds of international humanitarianism and heavy getting-lost partying. Somehow it ended in languages and doing. This time has been freedom: three weeks of no strict obligations but yet so many driving forces! Some of them showed in thirteenth where some photographps were added later, all around the flat-home.

Life has been whirling and days passed - fast but so full that I definitely don't feel like missing an-y/thing. Number 14 tells something about how this period started.